Saturday, September 17, 2011

The Apology

He enters the room 
As tension fills the air
Smothering my lungs
Into complete deterioration
Until I swear

I can feel my heart cease
The hands of the clock begin to slow
So leisurely
While I wait to breathe a sigh of relief
His authority cages my sense of being
And I long to escape
Because I am nothing here
I desire firm resolve
But will he care to hear me?
Feel my love though respect is shallow
Only respect can be earned in due time
Yet time has vanished
The chance is lost
Now who’s at fault where pure honesty pleads?
My apology is genuine
Yet, you won’t accept
As I am human
Full of lies
So where do we go from this point?
Relationships shattering
Like frail windows of abandoned temples
Once untainted
Now broken

As pressure builds
Within this “home”
Assumed hatred exposes itself
But truth

Is settled within my soul
There exists no hate
Only frustration
That festers every ounce of me
Driving me to become despicable
At the sight of myself
I feel pathetic
In which a thanks is in order
Now I will forgive
And ask for help
Where change in one’s self initially presents

But like a cycle of birth and death
You persist to behave in that manner
Believing destruction and ignorance will conquer
As affectively as a bulldozer to a feeble shack  
And, yes, I am the shack
Embodied with weakness, deficiency and shame
Containing nothing but insignificance
In which you have compelled me to become
So I stand here and I watch
So helplessly
While our precious dwelling is demolished
One wretched morsal at a time
Because stopping you would be a waste of energy
Your character has become the very definition of stubborn jackass
But why must you obliterate the bonds in your life
Relationships infused with a love misunderstood
Which you selfishly throw away
Because your blindness prevents you from seeing
What I’m worth and the person I have turned out to be
Growing up to find my perspective precisely as yours
So hold me in your heart just as you did when you first held me in your arms
Take a long, hard look
For I will evaporate from your grasp
Like the last rain drop from a single pond
Until those blinders disentigrate from your eyes

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